I've been reading some of the Seth Material recently and deeply resonated with the following words,
“Regardless of what you have been told, there is no merit in self-sacrifice. for one thing it is impossible. The self grows and develops. It cannot be annihilated. Usually, self sacrifice means throwing the “burden” of yourself upon someone else and making it their responsibility.”
Self sacrifice is a way we negate ourselves trying to earn our own or someone else's respect and care. We rescue someone else (i.e. take responsibility for them) by sacrificing our own needs, in the distorted effort to get our needs met. The myth is … “if I take good enough care of them now, they will take good care of me someday….”
Instead, we simply fail ourselves.
We fail to empower and nurture ourselves because we wrongly think that doing so is self centered or selfish and we want to be seen as selfless.
We negate, abandon and fail ourselves and then wonder why we are unhappy. We are sure it's because someone is not taking proper care of us so we prove our willingness to sacrifice all for them in an attempt to get their love and attention. We want to feel loved and cared for but it's either not acceptable or doesn't count to give it to ourselves. We are left feeling used up, abused, hurt and resentful.
We have failed to understand that the person most in need of our love is us … ourselves. No one else can provide the love we desperately seek out there. The simple truth is that we cannot truly love anyone else until we can nurture and love ourselves simply because we will resent them for the same things we have not accepted in ourselves.
Until we can become self loving, we will go on tearing ourselves down for others and resenting them for not doing the same for us.
We have learned to call this love … in fact is is simply unnecessary and self-destructive martyrdom.