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Rescuing “Professional” Victims Makes Matters Worse!

    Rescuing those who play victim as their primary mode of survival not only promotes a victim lifestyle, but may in fact be a major contributor to it.I am NOT saying we should not help others.However, to truly help someone there must be reciprocity.Humans need to feel useful and capable in order todevelop the self-esteem needed to do well in life.“Professional” victims see themselves

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Persecuting ourselves on the victim triangle

Hopefully we are growing in awareness of how we play out the victim triangle in our relationship with others. But are we as aware of how we play out the victim triangle internally with ourselves? As I questioned who I become when I believe the thought that I should be different, I saw how I move through all three roles on the victim triangle in

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Guilt Doesn’t Necessarily Mean We Are Guilty

photo credit: kelsey_lovefusionphoto I’ve found that feeling guilt does not necessarily mean we are guilty! Especially when it’s the kind of guilt that comes from rescuing others. When we are in the habit of assuming responsibility for others, we feel guilty anytime we are not taking care of them. But doing for those who can do for themselves is not always helpful. Feeling guilt at

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Questioning Our Limiting Notions About Others

photo credit: ePi.Longo As rescuers. we tend to believe that our dependent loved one(s) really can’t take care of themselves and … well, they often agree with us. They don’t happen to think that they can take care of themselves either! Such a mutually shared belief keeps us, as rescuers hooked into rescuer mode. (After all, “what will happen to them if we don’t take

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Self Sacrifice Is Not Love

by artyfishal44 I’ve been reading some of the Seth Material recently and deeply resonated with the following words, “Regardless of what you have been told, there is no merit in self-sacrifice. for one thing it is impossible. The self grows and develops. It cannot be annihilated. Usually, self sacrifice means throwing the “burden” of yourself upon someone else and making it their responsibility.” (The Nature

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