Every day is filled with opportunities for us to practice consciously choosing our responses to life. Rather than reacting habitually out of old patterns of belief we chose, instead, to be awake; we are watchful for times when our unconscious thoughts & words land us in a state of victimhood.
I often remind my clients that landing in a state of victimhood is a commonplace happening. It can be considered ‘normal,’ even inevitable, to move in and out of a state of victimhood throughout any given day.
It is unrealistic for most of us to achieve a complete absence of victim consciousness. That is not what counts anyway. What counts is how long we stay there. It is our return to reality that matters most, not how many times we get caught up in victim thinking.
How long does it take for us to recognize we’re in a state of victimhood and how immediate is our return to reality? That is what we want to work on.
Remember that a state of victimhood is never based on reality. It is based on our made-up stories about reality. That means that when we are in a state of victimhood we are out of touch with reality.
We return to reality by asking ourselves important questions such as, “What negative thought of mine is causing me distress right now? Am I willing to step into the observer’s seat and watch what happens when I believe that thought? Am I willing to get honest with myself about what I see? Am I more focused on finding and blaming an external problem or in freeing my mind from my own problem thinking? Am I 100% committed to clearing the thoughts that are keeping me in a state of victimhood or am I still making excuses and/or holding others responsible for my unhappiness?”