Meeting in the Middle; The War of the Opposites

When we are spiritually mature, we live at the dividing line, within ourselves and out in the world, between polarized opposites – between black and white, right and wrong – right where any polarized notion, position, or viewpoint meets the other point of view.

Through our maturing process, we move in towards the centerline where the opposites meet  (and often  clash) and away from the rigid outer extreme of our convictions. We travel away from the radical outer edges of our unquestioned assumptions about how life is …  and closer to the frontline of the “war zone between opposing forces.”  Part of our initiation and daily practice is to explore how to live in harmony with the opposites inside, as well as outside, of us.

This process of ‘softening' our former extreme convictions is not usually recognized as a good thing. To the contrary, we often experience it as a loss of passion, We think we are growing soft, or “wishy-washy” with old age … and feel ashamed or cowardly often when we lack the passion of our former convictions.

However, what may, in fact, be happening is simply a maturing wisdom within that no longer feels the previous driving compulsion to prove ourselves right! Rather than squaring off against the other side and proclaiming to the rafters our position on everything, we let go of our need to defend or justify our position, we no longer need to make them wrong so we can be right. We relax and begin to explore these well-defended convictions more closely.

Having traveled so far inward, away from our former outer & historically polarized positions in life, we now find ourselves rubbing elbows with the very ones we so bitterly stood in opposition against. As we intermingle with the “other side,” we come to see how faint is the line of distinction between ourselves & those we previously considered to be unworthy and ‘wrong.'


There is an increasing surrender and trust …

… and at that point, just before the union of opposites occurs, we are crucified.


The wrath of the opposites, both sides, is turned on us. Even those we previously considered to on our side, blame and attack us.

Why? For several reasons – one simple reason is because humans tend to attack whatever they don't understand. We, humans, turn against what we do not know or understand; if it's unfamiliar, we tend to see it as the enemy. We have changed, becoming an alien in our home country because we no longer think the same. The other side sees us as an infiltrator who poisons the “well of truth” (i.e. their own unquestioned convictions). We are seen as turncoats, and strangers, and the enemy. We experience what it is to be crucified.

I think perhaps this is a place on the spiritual journey of maturationthat we must all pass through.

Jesus was a powerful example of this place called crucifixion. His walk was one that shed much light on what can occur to those on the path to spiritual maturity if they dare to live in the gap between opposite extremes.

Not being able to understand why Jesus did what he did, his own disciple, Judas Iscariot,  betrayed his master by turning him over to his enemies (the other side). Of course the other side saw Jesus as a threat, precisely because his way was Love that brought people from all walks of life together in peace and healing – such an approach would take their control over others away and could not be tolerated.

In total surrender, without blame, Jesus modeled what it is to walk in peace with Reality. Aligned with Reality, He saw all men as equals, and saw himself as a servant in humble obedience to his Father. His was a path of peace, even in the midst of crucifixion.

It seems to me that our journey of spiritual maturity is bound to be a combination of both crucifixion and surrender. Perhaps one is required before the other can happen.

I pray you might decide to surrender and go where Source leads … to do so is a total love adventure, as well as a humbling ride.

May you give your self wholly to the whims and designs of Source, and like Rumi, accept with complete gladness even blows at the hands of Source, just to be in the Presence of Love, Reality, and Truth.



7 Responses

  1. Hi Lynne,
    Many of the techniques you reccomend for healing from the victim state, you refer to as working with the conscious mind. Do you consider these techniques to be working on the subconscious mind as well? The conscious mind uses up only 14% of our thinking potential, while the subconscious mind uses up 88% of our thoughts and beliefs. Whatever the conscious mind says or suggests to be true, the subconscious mind believes. These subconscious thought patterns can remain in our brains from way back to childhood, and, even today, conrol our self image, our self worth and beliefs about ourselves and others.

    What is your opinion on this idea?

    1. I think you do a good job here of explaining the process as I, too, see it. I see these conscious thoughts playing constantly on the waters of the subconscious (think background noise of a TV or of a radio playing constantly – we stop hearing what is said, but it’s still going into the mind). The receptive waters of the subconscious are stirred into an energetic pattern created by the thoughts, that is then projected into the physical where it manifests as a situation or encounter with another.
      Blessings, Lynne

  2. re-transforming victim consciousness.
    your observation -the war of the opposites -is stimulating.
    transactional hunger—so common —is formidable.
    how can I free myself from —” being approved ,
    appreciated,wanted by others ”
    in preference to higher ideals which you have
    my understanding of your views is ” Pay up the price
    if that is what you want”
    Jesus was UNAFRAID of solitude and could see himself
    put together.
    something of that kind is it within reach
    of ordinary mortals .?
    IF SO.Lynne may please elaborate more.
    Thanks nscpani( also in your weekly mailing list. )

    1. Hi nscpani, Thanks for your comments. Your question is a good one …
      Can we, as mere mortals, achieve a state of consciousness beyond victim consciousness. The answer is a simple and resounding yes! We can move beyond victim consciousness whenever we choose by stepping back from the low frequency generating thoughts we believe and that, in believing them, hold us prisoner and separate us from the higher frequency of peace found only in Reality.

      I believe we are enlightened whenever we are free of our low frequency, fear-generating, stories about ourselves and the world, and we move back into the unenlightened state of victim consciousness as soon as we pick those unhappy stories back up and believe in them yet again. So, you see, enlightenment is not a stationary state of being, but one that comes and goes.

      Understanding this allows us to realize that it’s not whether we go back into victim consciousness that determines the quality of our spiritual arrival, but how long we stay there. It’s not the going back into vc that causes a problem; it’s how quickly can we return to observer consciousness that furthers our enlightenment.

      This model has taught me that bouts of victim consciousness are not to be avoided, they are not signs of failure, or of poor spiritual growth, they are barometers, reporting to us, a blow by blow accounting of exactly where we are in the moment for the purpose of reflecting to us where we are believing a low frequency half truth or outright lie about ourselves or the world.

      Aligning with the Guiding Principles of Reality as found in my book, Guiding Principles for Life Beyond Victim Consciousness, are the path to the Observer Consciousness that enlightens us. Find evidence of these guiding principles in your day to day life and before you know it, you too will be experiencing the inner peace that comes from aligning with Reality.
      Blessings, Lynne

      1. from nscpani ref.your reply vide ref.
        responses to meeting in the middle.-the war of
        I have read and re-read your response./reply.
        You have not touched upon -what do we do for
        getting food ie transactional food -which I have
        CLEARLY mentioned?. HAVE I missed to understand
        something??? Even you get food because so manyyyy
        home on to you to upgrade their status if not in
        spirituality but at least to be appropriate in
        TRYING moments when just few milliseconds are
        only available.JESUS is an excellent example
        but to emulate him should not take more than
        30 minutes yes that is all why??? read next.

        FOR ANYONE ON THIS PLANET for what to do for next
        meal.All are resourceful .
        WHY NOT THE SAME WAY TO BE veryyy naturally
        resourceful when we want to better ourselves
        and in spite of added benfit of ” LYNNE FORREST”.
        My very humble view is may be there is
        something beyond even farthest reaches of
        human thinking .possibly here Jesus and
        such saints are needed to be understood.
        YET please dont leave out about transactional
        hunger which may give as some respite if not total
        spiritual lasting feel. nscpani.

        1. The hunger for transaction is sought externally through our relationships with others. Transactional hunger is the human search for what every human craves, whether they know it, or acknowledge it, or not – and that is love.

          Not only do we want love. We demand that it be unconditional love or else we won’t accept it as genuine. And then when others prove to be conditional in their loving (if they are capable of loving us at all) we feel hurt, betrayed, and disappointed, unloved, etc.

          We are born with this longing – this hunger for love – so we know it is meant to be and yet the world outside of us cannot supply it.

          Really, what human is capable of giving unconditional love? And perhaps ourselves least of all – we cannot even love ourselves without expectations and demands, how can we expect it from another?

          You ask how to get this need for transactional hunger met … There is only one place, only one Source, that we can turn to for the Unconditional Love we seek.

          We find that Love we seek by aligning with the guiding principles of Reality that have been discovered and rediscovered (because they are eternally true) over time by wise souls everywhere who devoted their lives to seeking Inner Peace.

          I have outlined some of these ancient guiding principles in my writing, because they are ones that I rely on for peace. They are the principles that will guide you, too, to peace if you are willing to practice them in your daily life.

          You can also find these guiding principles in my book, Guiding Principles for Life Beyond Victim Consciousness.

          Simply put, we must clear our minds of the untrue, limited beliefs we have lived out in our life (the process for doing that is described in my book as well) so that we can align with Reality and open to the abundance, peace, and unconditional love we find there.

          I hope this helps . Blessings, Lynne

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