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We teach others how to treat us

photo credit: ????? ??????? Having come from a family of much dysfunction: addiction, rage, depression, etc., I understand first hand the experience that comes from feelings of hopeless desperation. The insanity in my own life did not begin to diminish until I started noticing, and taking responsibility for, the way I interacted with others, until I recognized that my reactions to life were, in fact,

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Persecuting ourselves on the victim triangle

Hopefully we are growing in awareness of how we play out the victim triangle in our relationship with others. But are we as aware of how we play out the victim triangle internally with ourselves? As I questioned who I become when I believe the thought that I should be different, I saw how I move through all three roles on the victim triangle in

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Manipulating others to fit our idea of perfection

photo credit: Perfecto Insecto But what literally brought me to my knees that evening in the garden that I have been speaking to you about in the last several posts was the realization of how it is I treat others when I am engaged in the self-destructive cycle of trying to make me different, i.e. “right for God!” I saw how I speak and treat

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To Survive or To Save Others

photo credit: gogoloopie There’s a difference between what I call a starting gate persecutor and the persecutor role a rescuer plays as they trek around the triangle. It is this: A starting gate persecutor lives out of a deep-seated conviction that attack is the only way to survive. A starting gate rescuer in the role of the persecutor is a rescuer who feels frustrated because

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Toddler Tyrants of Victim Consciousness

photo credit: wsilver I had an image come to mind that I think aptly describes what victim consciousness sometimes looks like. My image is this: An adult-sized baby is throwing a toddler style temper tantrum; they wear a diaper and there’s a crown on their head; they are hollering, “I don’t like that! I don’t want it! You don’t treat me right. No fair! I’m

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