Watching my son move through his partners last days in a struggle with terminal illness, fills my heart with love and deep appreciation.
Andrew is indeed an amazing man! Although he is stretched thin with his care-giving and financial responsibilities, he handles it all with grace and courage, and without complaint. He exude s a beautiful maturity in his ability to accept and handle the reality that is his today.
As his mother I could not be more proud of, nor feel more heart-broken for, my precious son! But there are gifts too. Byron Katie says, “Every time someone dies, we are spared.” And that means everyone involved is spared something – pain, responsibility, something real – tangible.
Death brings its own sorts of blessings. Its really simple – this understanding of death, tho not easy. It amounts to this: death and birth are simultaneous realities. There cannot be one without the other. They co-exist side by side, making it impossible to experience one without the other being close on its heels. Death and birth are like doorways that lead from one room into another. We ‘die’ to the room we leave behind as we “birth” into the next. Such is the way of all comings and goings, of all birthing and dying – such is the way of life.
Most of us are unhesitant in proclaiming the wonders of birth. But I am finding that even in the dying process there is grace and beauty – and yes, even cause for celebration. Such an attitude towards death comes with acceptance and surrender to a process that is as natural as breathing.
I feel honored to stand by my son and his loved one as they move through this sadly beautiful and sacred life passage.