Well, here I am in Spain, preparing to start our walk on the camino to Santiago de Compostela tomorrow. It has already been a beautiful adventure just getting to this point, so I am alive with anticipation for what is to come! Let´s go back a minute and I’ll catch you up.
About two weeks before I left, I began a battle with inner ego about the journey. That voice began to throw curve balls of doubt and fear at me that left me sleepless and drained in the effort to alleviate the bodily apprehension generated. I heard every mental angle presented within my own mind about why I wasn’t ready to do this walk, how I was not prepared physically for the hardship on my health of such an ardous journey; how it had been pure folly for me to even entertain such a notion … in short an ¨ego trip of giant proportion. What’s worse, I found myself attaching belief to these stressful thoughts and reeling from the angst they caused. This led to immense stress on the liver, resulting in pain which, in turn was used by ego to verify it’s ¨case¨ against my going. At one point I truly considered backing out totally! It wasn´t until three days before departure that I finally got some relief. That morning I was awakened, yet again, in the wee hours before dawn by a ranting ego. In total desperation and feeling immense fear, I began to talk out loud to Source. I presented my problem and asked for clarity … and it came almost immediately. I heard my Inner Voice – I’ve learned to recognize It from the vibrational peace it brings – and these were It’s words … ¨Relax and Know that you are in the hands of the ¨I am¨… Have I ever failed to protect, guide and care for you? Why would this moment be any different? I am with you every step … you are safe! I will protect you, just as I do every day.¨
Simple words, perhaps … but no matter how many times I’d spoken similar words to myself throughout these weeks of turmoil they had not carried the impact with which they were delivered that particular morning. They brought tears of gratitude, relief and remembering. The mind quieted. Peace filled me then and has been with me since, even through the chaos of the next several days.
The day before I left I was in much physical distress. I made a careless choice the night before in an impulsive decision to celebrate the beginning of my journey. Jaquetta, the kids and I took ourselves out to a movie and I ate popcorn and chocolate and a cold drink. The next day, I paid. My liver ached from all the preservatives and sugar. Even through the pain however, I remained clear and in touch with the truth that I was, in reality fine. I knew I would have the energy needed at the time it was needed and instead of stressing out over the stomach and liver distress, I spent the afternoon resting and aligning.
At one point I was lying on my back under the big hickory tree in my back yard and gazing up at its wondrous canopy of green leaves. The branches were rustling with the aliveness of its interaction with the afternoon breezes and I was in quiet awe. I had the impulse to ¨merge¨with the tree as a way of imagining what being that hickory might be like. Probably the experience took no more than a couple of minutes time, but in that moment I became tree and felt the complete surrender of that entity to what is. No matter what weather or eventuality, hickory simply accepted it all with simplicity and grace. No contraction or attempts to prevent something from happening – not at all! It stood reaching its arms up to the heavens and sending its roots deep into the earths nourishing richness. From that place of grounded extension, it simply allowed life to be what it is. It was in that moment that my intention for the camino became clear. My desire and heartfelt goal for this trek was to be like the Hickory. To surrender with grace more deeply than ever before into the arms of Presence … to accept what life is and know that there is not a single thing that needs to be one bit different than it is. As is, is good – better than good as a matter of fact – Reality is absolutely perfectly abundant! My desire is to live so grounded in that truth – to be simple and clear in my intention to trust Reality, and like the Hickory, never falter in that knowing.
Sunday morning I was up, dressed and out the door on my way to the Nashville airport to catch an early flight out. Daniel drove me to the airport, about an hour and a half drive one way. We arrived at the airport in plenty of time, only to find that my flight had been cancelled! It seems the plane I was scheduled to take had failed the maintenance check that morning and was put out of commision for the day. So there I was, standing in a line of some 40 – 50 others all waiting to reschedule our flight path.
My frequency was high. I took it in stride. ¨I think I’d rather not be on that plane anyway¨, I joked with the passenger waiting in front of me. Already I was being given the opportunity to practice my intention to surrender and accept – how awesome is that! And throughout the whole roller-coaster affair it took (starting with being told that there was no way I would be able to fly out that day which would mean having to reschedule my whole itinerary in Spain, not to mention leaving my son alone overnight in Madrid while awaiting my arrival) I maintained a frequency based in gratitude for the opportunities being brought by the situation and trusting that everything was exactly right.
And it was! I was unerringly led to the booking agent who was able not only able to get me out that same day but in Madrid within two hours of my originally planned arrival time! And in my wake I was able to shower higher frequency wherever I went. That´s how it works, you know. When we align through surrender to Present Time we become a sort of watering vessel of higher frequency for those around us. This is how we ¨change the world¨! Through maintaining a consistent high and clear frequency we become ¨wayshowers¨of ¨The Way¨ for each person who crosses our path. Through us, their frequency is raised. With what result? They simply suddenly feel lighter inside, experience increased peace and feel generally happier. They may never consiously know why … they just know they enjoyed being with us. And that’s all there is to it. When we let go of the ego’s agenda about needing others to see us in a particular way – surrender the need to impress them with our importance and instead put our full intention in simply holding a consistent high frequency based in gratitude we become conduits for the most important mission possible – that of channeling Presence. Remember that Presence is made of only one thing … it is the eternal substance of Living Consciousness, otherwise known as ¨Love¨.
There’s just one more thing I want to pass along in this sharing of my own ¨experimentation¨with opening to Presence for now and that is this … The evidence thus far, is unfailngly that when I do not resist or refuse to accept this moments offerings, whatever it may be, I am able to maintain a stamina and flow of energy previously never experienced! For example … even without sleep for the 24 hours my travel to Spain ended up taking, I was able to spend the day of my arrival in Madrid ¨seeing the sights¨with my son as previously planned. It was not until late that night on the sleeper coach of a night train we took enroute to Galacia where our trek begins that I finally lay down to rest after more than 40 hours without sleep. Practicing these truths allows an effortless flow of Presence that nourishes me as well as those with whom I come in contact. Perhaps this is the secret formula to ¨eternal youth¨so often and widely sought by many! Hasta luego for now.